Cheating, adultery, and infidelity all describe the same act of nonconsensual sexual intimacy outside of the bonds of marriage. Sadly, they are all common occurrences, and they are frequently cited as causes for divorce. If you believe your significant other is cheating, you may want to eventually confront them and do something about it. 

However, before doing so, it is important to make sure that your suspicions regarding the infidelity are legitimate before confronting your partner with allegations. You must also take the time to understand a few important points about divorce in New Jersey.

New Jersey Divorce Grounds

Couples have two options for divorce in the State of New Jersey: fault and no-fault divorce. You can pursue the latter based on irreconcilable differences, or you may put forth a reason, such as cheating, to seek the former.

Ultimately, cheating may or may not be used as the underlying reason for a divorce. It is up to the spouses to decide how they file. Most couples choose to seek no-fault divorces, regardless of their circumstances. 

If cheating is involved, the divorce will also likely be a contested divorce, which means the couple cannot agree on one or more issues.

Signs of Cheating

Common signs of cheating include the following:

  • A surge in interest in sexual activity
  • A rise in interest in their appearance
  • Heightened privacy demands with you
  • New restrictions on devices such as cell phones and computers
  • More time than normal amounts of time being spent outside the home
  • Leaving the house at abnormal hours
  • Vague excuses and answers to questions about whereabouts and phone calls

For some, these signs present an opportunity to speak with their spouses about their concerns. However, cheating typically leads to lying and often causes the disloyal spouse to work even harder to cover their tracks. Others prefer to use these signs as clues and wait to confront them until they have the hard evidence they need. 

Proof of Cheating

If you plan on confronting your spouse about an affair (which you should not do before seeking legal advice first), you will want to have clear, hard evidence of the act – proof that simply cannot be explained away. For example, a single text containing steamy language may not be enough, especially if your spouse did not respond. And even then, a response to a lover’s message may not be enough.

Numerous texts back and forth containing personal, intimate details, however, would likely suffice. Even better would be photos of the cheating pair together in intimate acts. The bottom line is that you want to be 100% sure and have incontrovertible proof before confronting your spouse. 

In some cases, hard evidence of cheating is scant. In these instances, circumstantial evidence tends to abound. However, though it can be powerful proof, circumstantial evidence may also lead to false positives. 

Have a Plan

When you are certain of the cheating and intend to confront your spouse, you’ll want to have a plan for what comes next in the marriage. Various results are possible, depending on what your needs and wants may be. 

You may decide to forgive your spouse and completely forget the incident, seek counseling and forgive on a trial basis, or get a divorce. If seeking the last two, you are strongly advised to speak with a divorce attorney, especially if you have assets, children, a business, or all of the above.

An attorney will apprise you of the concerns and repercussions of your decision to confront and discuss your options as well. They will also help you develop a plan to face your spouse and provide you with on-point, pertinent guidance. 

Know Your Options

In the unfortunate event your spouse has indeed been cheating, you deserve to know your options regarding your future. The number one concern of a divorce attorney is your well-being. You can expect them to vigorously fight for your interests and provide you with the tailored guidance you deserve.

Contact the Bergen County Family and Divorce Law Firm of Arons & Solomon Divorce Lawyers for more help

Contact the experienced family attorneys at Arons & Solomon Divorce Lawyers today for legal assistance. Visit our law office in Bergen County or give us a call at (201) 487-1199 to schedule a free consultation with our team.

Bergen County Law Office
1 University Plaza Dr #400, Hackensack, NJ 07601, United States