Arons & Solomon Divorce Lawyers | May 28, 2025 | Divorce in Hackensack, NJ
Marital infidelity is a common reason couples separate and seek divorce. While cheating with another person negatively impacts the marriage relationship, marital infidelity can also impact the couple’s children. Understanding how marital infidelity impacts children during the New Jersey divorce process can assist parents as they help their children deal with the impact of divorce in Bergen County, NJ.
This article will explore the emotional, psychological, and legal impacts of infidelity on children during a divorce, provide guidance for parents navigating this difficult time, and look at when you may want to consider hiring a lawyer.
How Does Marital Infidelity Impact Children in New Jersey?
Marital infidelity can negatively affect children in many ways.
Common signs that your children may be struggling to deal with you or your spouse’s extramarital affair include:
Emotional Trauma
Children may experience significant emotional distress when they learn about a parent “cheating” on the other parent. They may feel betrayed and abandoned. Children often feel torn between their parents and guilty if they still love the parent who committed marital infidelity. Recognizing the warning signs of emotional distress is crucial so that parents can seek help for their children.
Relationship Problems
Children whose parents had affairs may experience problems in their relationships as adults. Witnessing a parent cheating on the other parent could have long-lasting impacts on a child’s ability to form and maintain close, loving relationships. They may struggle to believe they are worthy of love and commitment because they are similar to their parents.
Issues with Trust
Children whose parents are unfaithful may find it difficult to trust either parent, which can lead to the breakdown of the parent-child relationship. Children may find it difficult to be close to their parents and feel their parents have let them down.
These trust issues could lead to problems with the child’s current and future romantic partners, friends, and others. Children whose parents had extramarital affairs may find it difficult to believe someone can be faithful and honest with them.
Health Problems
Stress, emotional turmoil, and mental trauma can cause a variety of health problems for children. They may develop eating disorders and have problems with sleep. In some situations, a child may experience chronic headaches and high blood pressure. Stress can also result in a weakened immune system, which makes a child susceptible to illnesses.
Behavioral Problems
Children may develop behavioral problems as they struggle to deal with their parents’ marital infidelity. Young children may act out because they have not developed the skills to deal with complicated issues and emotions. Some children may develop negative and dangerous ways to cope with the stress caused by marital infidelity.
Issues with Self-Esteem
Children often struggle with low self-esteem because of their parents’ marital infidelity. Children may blame themselves because their parents are not faithful. It could lead to increased anxiety as they worry about the stability of their home. Stress and anxiety may erode self-confidence as they experience their personal safety being eroded by their parents’ behavior.
Struggling in School
Children whose parents are dealing with issues related to marital infidelity may have trouble performing well in school. A child who has always received good grades may be failing in school. They could be less motivated to do school work or focus in class.
How Can a Parent Help Their Child Deal with Marital Infidelity in the Home?
It is crucial that you reassure your child that it is not their fault. Reassure your child that both parents love them and that a parent’s infidelity does not reflect upon the child. A child needs to feel safe and secure in their home. They also need to believe they can discuss any subject with their parents. Therefore, encourage your child to ask questions and try to be honest with them in an age-appropriate manner.
It is also helpful to seek counseling from a professional therapist for your child. Children can benefit from therapy during a divorce, especially when the divorce involves marital infidelity and other sensitive topics. A family therapist can help your child process their feelings in a healthy manner.
Never talk with your child about the details of marital infidelity. Keep adult conversations between adults. You may want to speak negatively about your spouse, but it is crucial that you avoid doing so. Your relationship with your spouse should not prevent your child from maintaining a healthy and close relationship with their other parent.
If the marital infidelity includes domestic violence, protect yourself and your child by working with a family law attorney to obtain protection orders. A lawyer can help you seek full child custody if necessary.
Protecting Your Children and Your Rights—When to Consult a Family Law Attorney
Marital infidelity doesn’t just affect spouses—it can leave lasting emotional and psychological impacts on children. From trust issues and behavioral changes to academic struggles and health concerns, the effects are far-reaching and deeply personal.
As a parent, your support and sensitivity can go a long way in helping your child navigate this difficult period. However, when infidelity leads to separation or divorce, especially in complex situations involving custody, domestic violence, or contested parenting time, it’s critical to have the guidance of a skilled New Jersey family law attorney.
A lawyer can help you protect your child’s well-being, secure necessary custody arrangements, and advocate for your rights in court. In Bergen County and throughout New Jersey, a knowledgeable attorney can also guide you through obtaining protective orders, structuring parenting plans, and ensuring that the legal process minimizes disruption to your child’s life.
Contact the Bergen County Family and Divorce Law Firm of Arons & Solomon Divorce Lawyers for more help
Contact the experienced family attorneys at Arons & Solomon Divorce Lawyers today for legal assistance. Visit our law office in Bergen County or give us a call at (201) 487-1199 to schedule a free consultation with our team.
Bergen County Law Office
1 University Plaza Dr #400, Hackensack, NJ 07601, United States